omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
