we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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