Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
