At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
