HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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