when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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