Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
