I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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