I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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