C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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