Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize