He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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