im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
false alarm. still invincible.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
