is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
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