is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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