i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
