i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
