I'm really into asian looking animals
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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