i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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