ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
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