I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Randomize
