I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
only if we run a train.
done.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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