What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
