i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
