I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
