Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
