Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
