better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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