this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
it hurts more in the daytime
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I'm always down for nudity.
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