Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Randomize
