So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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