This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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