She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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