His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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