Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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