..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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