i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
