You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
