is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Randomize
