Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
