i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Its about making memories worth repressing
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
