talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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