just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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