Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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