that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
