I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
