we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
