one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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