did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
