Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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